Classes I'm glad I took in law school

Classes I'm glad I took in law school, so that I'm not looking at the material now for the very first time:

• 1st Amendment
• Employment Discrimination
• an upper-level contracts course
• 1st Amendment
• Corporations, Partnerships, Agency Law
• Trusts and Estates
• 1st Amendment
• Entertainment Law (invasion of privacy torts)
• did I mention 1st Amendment?

I wouldn't say that Administrative Law was a complete waste of time. I don't think Chevron is going to show up on the bar exam, but being able to explain why and how the FDA can suddenly regulate cigarettes can be handy at parties. The kinds of parties I usually end up at, anyway.

Because, really, that's the only reason anyone goes to law school: to be able to tell people what to do when they get pulled over for speeding but there's a nickel bag in their pocket, or whether they should go ahead and declare bankruptcy, or explain the finer distinctions between warrantless wiretapping, legal eavesdropping, pinhole video surveillance, and closed-circuit security cameras.

Does anyone even say nickel bag any more?